The moment is coming. You must decide what to do. You look determined, but you do not know what it will cost you. You have no idea how painful it will be for you.
You are trying to convince yourself that there is no other way, you must commit genocide, kill thousands in order to save millions. That is not a good reason, that is not a reason at all. You cannot justify such sin.
You are willing to become a monster, to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders. You are not prepared for that. You will break. You will regret it for all eternity.
You will not be able to live with yourself after this.